Burnout
by BillyMartinGoodCharlottefan
Summary: After Johnny and Dally die, TwoBit is having trouble coping with the grief. Can a girl help him before he hurts himself?
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note: Here's another story from me. Since I've written two stories about Ponyboy, I decided to make this one about Two-Bit. The POVs change during the story, but it says at the beginning of the section whose POV it is. I hope you like it!

Oh, and animalsare4life and anyone else who was wondering what Pony did with the ring in my other story…I had several ideas, but none of them really worked, so I'll leave that to your imagination.

Chapter One

Two-Bit

I stumbled out of the bright sunlight and into the pharmacy. I was glad to be inside where it was a bit darker because I had an awful hangover. How many beers had I had last night? Ten? Fifteen? I had no idea, but I think it was a new record for me, and now I had an awful headache. That was the whole reason why I had even left my house; we were all out of Aspirin.

I leaned on the counter and waited for someone to help me. I had been standing there for a good five minutes when I saw the sign that said 'for service, please ring bell'. There was a bell sitting next to the sign. I rang it and then resumed leaning against the counter with my head buried in my hands to block out the light. Maybe I'd have to get some sunglasses too.

I felt a hand on my shoulder, and then someone said "Can I help you?"

I looked up into a pair of intense green eyes. They belonged to a girl that looked about my age. I was about to ask her for some Aspirin when my head started pounding and I felt like I was going to faint. I sunk down onto one of the barstools by the counter. Why hadn't I noticed those before? I could have been sitting down.

"Are you alright?" The girl asked.

"I need some Aspirin," I said. "For my head."

The girl nodded and then disappeared. I hoped she would hurry up. My head hurt really, really bad. I had walked here, but I didn't think that I could make it home. Maybe I could hitchhike or something. What was my address again?

The girl reappeared with a bottle of Aspirin and a cup of water. "I thought you might want to take some of the Aspirin now," She said as she nodded to the cup of water.

I took three Aspirins and then started looking in my pockets for some money. I couldn't find any money. Not even a nickel or a dime or something; nothing, just some lint. I put my head in my hands and sighed. How could I have done something so stupid? I can't just be hung over, I must be getting sick. I could feel the girl staring at me.

"Forgot my money," I said softly.

"What?" The girl asked.

I looked up at her "I forgot my money." I was about to cry because I felt so awful. Why couldn't she just take out a gun and shoot me? Instead of shooting me the girl nodded and pressed some buttons on the cash register.

"There," She said. "Now it says you paid for it, and if someone notices the money is gone then I'll just say it's my fault. I really don't care if I get fired anyway because I hate this job."

"Thanks," I said.

"Sure. Now go home, you look really awful," the girl said.

I grabbed the Aspirin and stumbled out of the pharmacy. The words of the girl were still ringing in my ears. "Now go home, you look really awful." I just wished I could remember where home was, my head was foggy. There was a bench in front of the pharmacy and I flopped down on it. I was going to have to stop drinking, but I just couldn't help it. I'd been drinking more ever since Johnny and Dally had died because, in a way, I wanted to die too. The gang hadn't noticed because they were all to busy with their own grief to notice me. Plus, I tried to act like my normal self around them. They had already lost enough people; they didn't need to see that I was slipping away too.

My head was feeling so terrible. I laid down on the bench, I didn't care if I looked like some kind of hobo; I would just be there for a minute. I sighed, I wanted to go home, but I had no idea where home was. I also wanted my Mickey Mouse.

Not a lot of people know this, actually, no one knows this, but I have this stuffed animal Mickey Mouse. I got it when I was two years old for my birthday, and I took it everywhere with me until I was four. Now, Mickey is under my bed most of the time but whenever I feel sick or upset I get it out and cuddle it. It always makes me feel better. If anyone found out about Mickey my reputation would be shot, but I'd taken a lot of time to make sure that no one found out. Now though, I really didn't care; I wanted to go home, and I wanted my Mickey Mouse.

I decided to take a nap, right there, on the bench. I would just sleep for a few minutes, and maybe when I woke up my headache would be gone and I could remember where I lived.

At least, I hoped I would.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

Two-Bit

When I woke up it was cold and dark outside. My head still hurt, I was groggy, and I still couldn't remember where I lived. I sat up and looked around. The pharmacy was dark and I could see the girl that gave me the Aspirin walking around inside, maybe she could help me. I watched her walk toward the door and flip the sign on it to 'Closed'. Then she left the pharmacy and locked the door behind her. Then she saw me.

"Hey," she said as she walked over to the bench. "What are you still doing here?"

"I…" I started, but I didn't finish. What was I supposed to say? I couldn't remember where I live because I have a hangover? I fell asleep on the bench, and I don't feel up to walking home? None of those sounded like very good things to say, so I did the best I could, "I don't feel very good."

"Do you want me to take you home?" The girl asked. "Where do you live?"

I couldn't say that I didn't remember where I lived, so I lied, "I don't have anywhere to go. Mom couldn't pay the rent, so they kicked us out."

"I'm so sorry," the girl said. "Is there anything I can do?"

"I dunno," I replied sleepily. I was tired.

The girl looked at me for a while and then said, "You look pretty harmless. Do you want to come home with me? I have a spare room that you can stay in."

I nodded absently, I hadn't even heard her; I was starting to doze off.

"OK. My car is over here. My name's Savannah." The girl said.

"Two-Bit," I said as I got into her car.

"What?" The girl asked.

"I'm Two-Bit," I said. "What's your name again?"

"Savannah," Savannah said as she started the car.

We drove through all the neighborhoods on the East Side, and then we started toward the West Side. I was starting to get a bad feeling about this. What if Savannah was a Soc and she was going to kill me? I decided that Savannah probably wasn't going to kill me. In fact, she almost looked afraid of me; she would glance at me every couple of seconds. But then, maybe she wasn't afraid of me. Maybe she thought that I was going to just suddenly die and it would look like she had murdered me. If I looked as bad as I felt, then me dying wouldn't be completely out of the question.

After a while, Savannah's car slowed down and stopped. I had been half-asleep with my head leaned against the window. By then it was almost a sure thing that I was sick, I had never felt this bad with a hangover. Savannah reached over and gently shook me; she probably thought that I was asleep.

"Here we are," Savannah said once she realized that I was awake. "You'll have to walk a bit; this was the closest place I could get."

I realized that we were in front of an apartment complex, and a really nice one; it had a lobby and everything. I didn't like the idea of having to walk, but I knew that I would have to. I couldn't just live in Savannah's car for the rest of my life.

I slowly got out of the car and stood up. I instantly started feeling dizzy, my knees buckled but Savannah was there and she caught me before I could fall too much. I leaned against Savannah as we walked through the lobby and into the elevator that would take us to her apartment. I had no idea what floor it was on, but I hoped we would get there soon.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

Savannah

It was really weird, but I wasn't scared of this Two-Bit guy at all. I mean, he was a Greaser, aren't they supposed to be kind of bad? I kept on telling myself that this was stupid and dangerous, but then I would look at Two-Bit and decide that he was too sick to hurt me. I've always been kind of a bleeding heart; doing stuff like giving money to street people even though I knew they were going to use it to buy pot. This though was kind of extreme, even for me. What would my mother say?

My apartment is on the fifth floor, but the elevator is really slow, and it seemed like people got on at every floor. They all gave Two-Bit these strange and disapproving looks. If I had won the lottery, I couldn't have been happier than I was when the elevator got to my floor. Two-Bit shuffled along beside me as we walked down the hallway to my apartment. When we finally got there I hurried to unlock the door. I didn't need anyone seeing me and starting rumors. All the other tenants hate me enough as it is.

We were greeted by my ancient Chow, Sheba, when we walked in. She, like me, could sense that something was wrong with Two-Bit and instead of sniffing him like she does to everyone else, she started licking his hand. Two-Bit, who had been almost asleep sort of jumped and looked down at Sheba. He absently scratched her head and then looked at me. His eyes, which I could tell would normally be a really pretty grey, were bloodshot and it looked like he was fighting to keep them open. The look he gave me said 'I feel terrible'. Two-Bit sort of moaned and laid his head on my shoulder; he had a fever; his forehead was burning my shoulder.

"I feel awful," Two-Bit said.

Once again I tried to tell myself that this was stupid and dangerous, but Two-Bit looked at me with his grey bloodshot eyes, and I knew I was doing the right thing.

"Come on," I said softly, "Lets find you a place to lie down."

Two-Bit

A few minutes later, I was laying in Savannah's guest room with a mountain of blankets on me. Her dog was lying next to me looking at me worriedly. I wanted more blankets. God, how did I get so sick? I wasn't acting very tough either; I was a disgrace. What was wrong with me? To make matters even worse, my head was hurting more (if that was possible).

I heard the door open and I looked up to see Savannah. She sat down on the edge of the bed.

"Are you OK?" Savannah asked. I think she knew the answer.

For a second, I had this flashback to when I was a little kid. I was sick, and mom was holding me and telling me that everything would be OK. That was before my little sister was born, and before she had to get a job at a seedy bar to keep us all fed.

Suddenly, I wanted Savannah to hold me and make me feel better like my mom had. I didn't care if I hardly knew her. But the feeling quickly passed, I guess the fever had gotten the best of me for a minute. I realized that Savannah was staring at me.

"Are you OK?" she asked.

"No," I replied quietly. I just wanted to sleep.

Savannah put her hand on my forehead, "You have a really high fever," she said. I normally would have said something witty in return, but I just wasn't feeling up to it.

"How long have you been feeling bad?" Savannah asked.

"Since this morning," I mumbled. I wanted Savannah to leave me alone so I could sleep.

Savannah nodded and stood up. "I'll be up for a bit longer," she said. "Yell if you need anything."

I nodded. I didn't say that I didn't think I could yell if my life depended on it. It didn't really matter because I was just going to be asleep anyway.

But I couldn't get to sleep. My head was pounding and I was exhausted, but I just couldn't sleep. I tossed and turned for several hours. First I was too cold, then I was too hot, then I was too cold again. Savannah's dog was still looking at me with that same worried expression. I didn't even know dogs could be worried, maybe I was just seeing things.

I was too cold again, and I had curled up into a miserable, helpless ball in hopes of keeping warm. What if the gang saw me like this? Was this what Johnny felt like when he was dying? I hoped not, Johnny didn't deserve to be this cold and sick and miserable. What if I was dying? Savannah's words came back to me "Yell if you need anything."

"Savannah," I said. "I'm dying, come quick."

I knew she couldn't hear me. I laid there, miserable and shivering until morning.


	4. Chapter 4

Author's note: I just realized I forgot to put in a disclaimer so…

Disclaimer: I do not own The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton

Chapter Four

Two-Bit

I didn't get any sleep at all.

I was freezing all night, I tried to call Savannah to tell her to bring me another blanket, but she couldn't hear me. There were several times when I thought I had to be dying. I stared at the clock, watching the minutes crawl by. My eyes were heavy and hurting, every part of me was screaming 'Sleep!' But I couldn't.

To make everything worse, Savannah's dog snores. It seemed like it was taunting me because it could sleep and I couldn't.

I think the fever finally took over.

I heard Savannah get up a while later and call in sick to work. Why was she calling in sick? I'm the one that's sick. The door opened and I looked up, so did Sheba. Sheba jumped off the bed and walked over to Savannah. She looked up at her and started making these whimpering begging noises. After a minute though, I realized that it wasn't the dog that was begging for Savannah's attention.

I was.

Savannah walked past Sheba and over to me. I was still whimpering.

"It's OK," Savannah said softly.

My head was spinning. My eyes hurt. What was wrong with me?

Savannah put her hand on my forehead. "You still have a fever," she said. "And you look terrible."

All that I could do was moan, I was too sick to talk.

"Do you want me to call a doctor?" Savannah asked.

I had another flashback to when I was a kid. Mom had called a doctor that time I was sick. The doctor gave me this awful tasting medicine, but mom told me it would make me feel better, so I took it. After taking the medicine, mom would give me ice cream. And the medicine did make me feel better after a few days…

"Two-Bit?" Savannah said, "Do you want me to call a doctor?"

I nodded. Maybe the doctor could help me feel better.

Savannah

I hung up the phone, the doctor would be coming over in half an hour or so. I walked back toward the guest room where Two-Bit was staying. Poor guy, I could tell he was suffering.

When I opened the door to Two-Bit's room he didn't even look up. He usually notices when I come in the room. Maybe he was asleep.

"Two-Bit?" I said softly as I sat down next to him. His eyes were closed, but he was breathing too heavily to be asleep.

"Hey," I said. "Are you awake?"

"Johnny?" Two-Bit asked.

"What?" I said. Who's Johnny?

Two-Bit opened his eyes and gave me a confused look. He blinked several times and then mumbled "Oh, sorry. Never mind."

"I called a doctor, he'll be here soon," I said.

"Mmmm," Two-Bit replied.

I sat next to Two-Bit for a while. Sheba was still lying next to him. She had this weird look on her face, it almost made her look worried. Two-Bit's face was pale, all but his cheeks which were a deep shade of pink. His eyes were closed, but I could tell he wasn't sleeping. It seemed like he was fighting to breathe. He would shiver every few minutes.

"Savannah," Two-Bit said. "I want another blanket."

Two-Bit already had a mountain of blankets on him. I could tell he was cold though. I got up to get him another blanket.

When I came back in the room, Two-Bit was asleep.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

Two-Bit

I kept having the strangest dream.

I dreamed that Johnny was sitting next to me. He looked like he did before the fire, before he got burned. He didn't have his scar either, the one he got when the Socs beat him up. Johnny talked to me for a while, but I couldn't really hear what he was saying.

After a while, Johnny sighed and said "Time to go, Two-Bit."

I was confused and said "Go where?"

Johnny just shook his head. "It's your fault you know," Johnny said. "You killed me."

I tried to ask Johnny what he meant, but he disappeared.

Then I woke up.

I knew that the dream was true though, I had killed Johnny.

I know that Ponyboy thinks it's his fault, but it's not, it's mine. I should have kept Johnny with me that night. I actually didn't go to a bar that night, for once. I just went home. If I had taken Johnny with me then he wouldn't have killed that Soc and he would still be here.

"I'm sorry," I said. "I didn't mean to kill you."

"What are you talking about?" a voice asked.

I jumped and looked in the direction of the voice. Savannah was sitting next to me. I didn't know she was there.

"What about killing someone?" Savannah asked.

I couldn't let Savannah know that I was a murderer. She would kick me out, and I needed a warm place to sleep. She would also call the cops. I had to think of a story.

"I said…my head is killing me," I lied.

"I'm sorry," Savannah said softly. "I'll bring you some Aspirin, and I think it's time for the medicine Dr. Jones gave you."

The doctor had come over while I was asleep. I had the flu, and the doctor also said that there was a high percentage of alcohol in my blood or something. So maybe I also had a bit of a hangover. Anyway, the doctor gave me some medicine, and I hoped that it would work.

Savannah came back in and gave me the medicine then she sat down next to me. I wanted to talk to her, maybe about my dream. I couldn't do that though; then she would know that I had killed Johnny. I just laid there in silence. Savannah talked for a while, but it was all just that stuff that you say to sick people like: 'poor baby', and 'I know you don't feel good, I'm so sorry.' She really wasn't making me feel better.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six

Savannah

Two-Bit was having a nightmare.

I watched him tossing and turning. I didn't know if I should wake him up or not; he needed sleep, but if he was having a bad dream it was probably the right thing to do to wake him up.

"Johnny," he mumbled.

He keeps asking for Johnny. I have no idea who he is.

"I'm sorry," Two-Bit said. "I didn't mean to kill you."

He also keeps saying that he killed someone. He couldn't have killed someone, his picture would have at least have been in the paper.

"No," Two-Bit sobbed. "It was an accident. I couldn't help it."

I reached out and gently shook Two-Bit. He jumped, screamed, and looked at me wild-eyed. He was breathing really hard. After a while Two-Bit calmed down.

"It was just a dream," he said to himself. Then he shook his head and sighed.

"Are you Ok?" I asked.

Two-Bit nodded, "Yeah," he said. "Fine."

I didn't think that Two-Bit was Ok, but I didn't want to make him talk to me. He still wasn't feeling good; I would try to talk to him when he was feeling better.

"Hey Savannah," Two-Bit said.

"Yeah," I replied.

"Could you get me something to drink?" Two-Bit said. "I don't care what, just anything."

"Sure," I said.

I kind of got the feeling that Two-Bit was trying to get rid of me.

Two-Bit

I had the dream again.

It gets worse and worse every time. I begged Johnny to forgive me, but he just kept on telling me that I had killed him. That wasn't like him, he would have forgiven me.

I'm scared. I'm actually scared; the dream makes me never want to sleep again. Damn it, I'm shaking.

I'm not thirsty at all; I just had to get rid of Savannah for a while. I was afraid that I was going to cry, but I think I'm over it now.

It was just a dream; Johnny can't come out of the grave and kill me. He's dead, he's gone. So why is he haunting me? Calm down, it was just a dream, it's OK.

A tear spilled down my cheek.

I've never cried because I was scared before. I'm not thinking clearly. I know that it was just a dream.

But it wasn't a dream, it's real. It's my fault that Johnny is dead; it's all my fault. I deserve this. I deserve all of this, getting sick, crying because I'm so scared. I deserve it all. It's like payback for my killing Johnny. We're no where near even; I'm going to have to suffer a lot more before we're even.

Savannah should be coming back soon. I know that she suspects something. I need to get my act together. I just hope I can.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

Two-Bit

I've got to get out of here.

It's been three weeks, I'm mostly better. My nose is still stopped up, and I get headaches a lot, but other than that I'm fine. Savannah has been leaving me to go to work for the past couple of days. She's been hinting that she wants to talk to me about the nightmares that I had while I was sick. I was never going to tell her, or anyone. I have to get out of here.

I remember where I live now; I have for a long time. I want to get home, I'm sure everyone is worried about me; I've been gone for three weeks. I can't just leave though. Savannah took care of me; she didn't have to do that. I wish there was something I could give her, but I don't have anything. Maybe I should wait until she gets home to leave, but then she might want to talk to me about my dream. I can't talk about that, not yet.

Then there's the problem of actually getting home. I can't just walk, it's several miles. I don't have money for bus fare and I can't steal any money from Savannah. I don't feel like hitchhiking. There's always a chance that you'll be picked up by some psycho when you do that, and I'm not up to fighting off a psycho. I guess I could call someone and tell them to pick me up. That would make an interesting phone call. "Hey you guys. I'm stuck on the Soc end of town with no way to get home. Why you ask? Well, I was completely helpless with the flu for the past several weeks and I was staying in some random girl's apartment." That wouldn't work either.

I finally decided on taking the bus. I felt bad stealing from Savannah, but it was just a few cents. I also wrote a note and left it on the kitchen table. It said:

_Savannah,_

_I wanted to stay longer, but I can't. I can't tell you why. I'm really confused and I need to go back home to sort things out. Thanks for taking care of me. If you ever need a favor just go to the east side and ask for Two-Bit Matthews. Someone will find me for you. I feel terrible for leaving; you were so nice to me. I just had to leave; I'm sure you understand._

_Thanks again,_

_Two-Bit_

That was probably one of the longest things I had ever written. Savannah's dog walked over to me and sniffed me.

"Bye, Sheba," I said.

Sheba kind of cocked her head to one side and looked at me strangely. Her expression said "Where are you going?"

I shook my head and walked out the door. I went to the bus stop and caught the bus home. At least, I thought I was going home. The closer I got to the east side, the more I felt like I was leaving home. I told myself that it was just because I'd been living at Savannah's apartment for so long, but something just didn't feel right.

Savannah

Two-Bit was gone.

When I came home the apartment felt really empty. I called out Two-Bit's name several times, but he didn't respond. Then I found the note on the table.

When I was done reading the note I felt like crying. I don't really know why. I guess it was because I had gotten so used to having Two-Bit around. I missed him. Why did he leave? Was it something I did?

I made dinner and took Sheba on a walk, but I was still thinking about Two-Bit. I hoped that he was Ok. I wanted him to come back.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

Author's Note: Thanks for the reviews! Oh, and XAmberX, yes, I do listen to Green Day.

Two-Bit

When I got off the bus I started toward the Curtis'. I figured that everyone would be there. I was a few yards from their house when I saw Steve walk out. He actually didn't have Soda with him. That was really weird; they're best friends. Why wasn't Soda with him? Steve was looking down, but he looked up and saw me.

"Hey, Two-Bit," Steve said. He sounded kind of sad. "Where have you been?"

"I was sick," I said.

"I went by your house a few days ago, no one was there," Steve said.

"It's a long story," I replied. "I think I should tell everyone at once." I started toward the house, but Steve stopped me.

"You don't want to go in there," Steve said.

"Why?" I asked.

Steve sighed, "Come to the park," he said. "I'll tell you there."

A few minutes later, Steve and I were in the park, sitting on a bench.

"So what happened?" I asked.

Steve took a deep breath. "Ponyboy killed himself yesterday."

"What?" I said. I felt like I was going to faint. Pony…he couldn't die. He was different, he was smart; always reading, and he had this weird obsession with the movies. He couldn't be dead, it wasn't right.

"I know," Steve replied. "He just felt so guilty about Johnny dying. He couldn't take it anymore. Darry and Soda are going crazy. I went over to try to comfort Soda, but there's pretty much nothing we can do right now."

There was a long awkward pause. Pony couldn't be dead.

"Darry's sick," Steve continued. "He's the one that found Pony's body. He wouldn't stop holding him. He kept saying 'wake up, buddy, wake up.' He kept promising to bake him a cake, to do whatever he wanted for a day if he would just wake up. He just can't accept that he's dead. When they came for Pony's body they had to pretty much yank him out of Darry's arms. They made the stupid mistake of putting Pony in the body bag right in front of Darry. Darry just…he completely freaked out. He started screaming and trying to get Pony back. Then he threw up and passed out. He's just been wandering around the house draped in one of Ponyboy's blankets and muttering 'Where is he? Where is he?'"

This was terrible. It was all my fault. I had killed Johnny, but Ponyboy thought it was his fault. Now Pony is gone, Darry and Soda are going crazy with grief, and I left Savannah without saying goodbye. My head started to throb. This was not the time for a headache.

"Soda's really upset too," Steve added. Was he trying to make me feel bad? "He's trying to stay strong for Darry, but…I mean he lost his brother. He's not doing too good. They just don't know what they're going to do. I think Darry's going to kill himself too. He's pretty much dead already."

"I always thought Darry was pretty bomb-proof," I said.

"I did too," Steve replied. "But you just need to see him. No, you don't need to see him; you don't want to. It's pretty bad."

Steve and I sat there for a long time. Then he finally said, "So, where were you?"

I didn't feel like talking to Steve anymore. I needed to go home, take some Aspirin, lie down, and try to digest what I'd just heard.

"I'm not up to it now," I said. "I'll tell you tomorrow."

I got up and walked off. Steve didn't even ask me where I was going. I wandered around aimlessly for a while. I went to the pharmacy to see if Savannah was there, but it was closed and empty. I started walking home.

The house was empty. I went to the medicine cabinet and took a lot of Aspirin. I don't know how much, it was probably about six pills. I stumbled toward my room and fell into bed. The same thought kept running through my head, 'Ponyboy is dead, and you killed him, just like you killed Johnny.'


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

Soda

Ponyboy is dead.

I can't believe it. I knew that he was depressed, but I thought that he was getting a bit better. He must have just been pretending. I feel so terrible, how did I not see this coming?

Darry is taking this worse than I am. He's completely in shock. He's wandering around the house draped in Pony's baby blanket. He's looking for Pony; he doesn't know that he's gone. Actually, I think Darry knows that Pony is gone, he just can't accept it.

Darry's eyes are glazed; he's walking by me again. He keeps muttering 'Where is he?' He mostly sits in the room that Pony and I shared; waiting for Pony to come back.

But Pony isn't coming back.

I think Darry is sick. He's thrown up several times. I've tried to get him to lie down, but he refuses. He says that he has to look for Pony. I don't know what I'm going to do. I'm trying to stay strong for Darry, but I'm starting to come unglued. What'll I do?

Savannah

I read the saddest story in the paper today.

This boy, his name was Ponyboy, killed himself. He's pretty famous; he and his friend Johnny saved some kids from a fire a few months ago. I remember Johnny didn't make it.

Ponyboy's parents are dead; he's been living with his two older brothers. They both dropped out of school to keep the family together. Everyone thought they were doing Ok. Since Johnny died though, they said that Ponyboy was depressed. In fact, that's the whole reason Pony killed himself; he missed Johnny and he felt like he had killed him.

The paper said his brothers weren't handling his death well. It described his oldest brother as 'sick and in shock' and the other as 'trying to stay strong, but falling apart'.

The story makes me worry about Two-Bit. I hope he's Ok.

Two-Bit

I want to lie in bed for the rest of my life.

People can bring me food and stuff to drink. Or they can just leave me alone until I waste away. I don't care; they're both the same thing.

If I stay in bed then I won't be able to kill anyone.

I miss Savannah. I can't believe I'm thinking about her, but I am. I wish I knew her last name. If I did, I would look her number in the phone book and tell her to come get me. I'm sure she would. Maybe I should walk to the pharmacy and see if she's there, but I can't. I might kill someone if I leave my bed. I don't think I could live knowing I'd killed another person.

Maybe I should go to the Curtis' and tell them that I'm sorry, that it's my fault. The way Steve talked though, it sounded like I shouldn't talk to them yet. I buried my face in my pillow. I had wanted so badly to come home, but now I realize that I'm not home at all. Savannah's apartment is where I belong, but I don't know where that is.

I guess I'll just lay here…for the rest of my life.

Soda

Darry has been wandering around for three days. He collapsed from exhaustion a few hours ago. Somehow I managed to drag him to his bed. He's been sleeping for a while, but now I can hear him crying.

I've been crying too. Now is pretty much the only time I can cry, I don't want Darry to see me. The worst part was when I had to talk to the guys at the funeral home. I had been trying to think that Pony was still alive, but talking to them had destroyed those thoughts. The funeral is in two days. I hope that Darry will be kind of sane for it; I'm afraid of what he'll do.

I heard the door to Darry's room open. Darry walked over to the couch and sat down next to me.

"Pony's really gone?" Darry asked. There was so much pain in his eyes. I wanted to say no, that Pony would be coming home soon, but I couldn't lie to him.

"Yeah," I said. "Pony's gone."

"He's not coming back?" Darry asked.

I shook my head, "No," I said weakly.

Darry started crying and so did I. We sat on the couch holding each other and crying for our lost baby brother.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Two-Bit

Steve came by a while ago. He told me that Pony's funeral was in a few hours. He was going, and he asked me if I wanted to come.

I didn't know what to do. I felt like I should go since it was my fault that Ponyboy is dead, but I didn't want to. I knew that I couldn't handle seeing the casket and knowing that Pony was in it.

I told Steve that I wasn't feeling well, and I would come if I felt better. It was true though, I wasn't feeling good. I felt guilty, of course, but I also felt sick to my stomach and headachy. It was probably because I hadn't had anything to eat in two days; I've just been lying in bed feeling guilty. I don't want to get up; I'm not motivated enough. Mom and my sister came in and asked me where I had been. I told them that I was sick and that I still didn't feel very good. They left me alone after that. There aren't words to describe how happy I was.

Steve came over at ten. He said the funeral was at five. It's noon now. I think I'll take a nap for a few hours and see if I feel better. I really should go to his funeral.

Steve

I don't know what is wrong with Two-Bit, but he'd better get he heck over it.

I know that Pony is dead, we're all sad about that. Yes, even I'm kind of sad that the kid is dead, but Two-Bit is taking his death worse than Soda is. That's pretty sad.

I went by Two-Bit's to tell him about the funeral and guess what he was doing? He was lying in his bed; sulking. I told him about Pony's funeral and he just gave me the lame 'I'm not feeling well' excuse.

Pathetic, he's upset that Pony's dead and he's not even going to come to his funeral. Doesn't he know that Darry and Soda need us now? I think that I should go over there, drag his ass out of bed, and bring him to the funeral.

Maybe I'm being a little harsh, and maybe I'm a little drunk. Still though, Two-Bit isn't acting right. It's kind of annoying.

Two-Bit

I was going to go to Pony's funeral, I really was. But I slept too long. When I woke up it was after seven o'clock. I figured that the funeral would be over, so I was going to go to the Curtis' and tell Darry and Soda that I was sorry. I got up and got dressed, but it seemed like the more I walked around the sicker I felt. I ended up throwing up.

Mom was home, she was about to go to work. She was wearing her tacky barmaid outfit. It was kind of weird; she was acting all mom-like and dressed like a whore. I don't think those things go together.

Mom asked me if I needed anything and I said no. She asked me if she should stay home. I really wanted her to, but I said no. Mom asked me if I'd been eating.

"You look skinnier," Mom said. "Eat some soup or something."

After that, mom was gone and I was all alone in the house. I was lonely. I rolled out of bed and got my stuffed animal Mickey Mouse out from under the bed.

"What am I gonna do, Mickey?" I asked it.

Mickey just smiled at me. I held Mickey Mouse close to my aching stomach, but it didn't help much.

"I'm so lonely," I muttered to myself as I fell asleep.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Soda

The funeral was a nightmare.

Steve showed up drunk and raving about how Two-Bit was a spineless faggot because he wouldn't come to the funeral. Darry was crying and I had to get him a new tissue every three seconds.

Once the service started, Steve was still raving about Two-Bit. That was really getting on my nerves, but on the bright side Darry's crying had been reduced to a few sniffles.

When Darry and I had to throw the handful of dirt on the coffin, Darry broke down again. He started sobbing, Steve yelled at him that he was just as bad as Two-Bit and then stormed off. Darry couldn't quit crying, the minister guy was staring at us, and I just lost it.

I pulled my hair and screamed "I can't take it anymore!" Then I bolted for home. Once I'd gotten there, calmed down, and changed I realized I had forgotten Darry. I didn't really trust him to find his own way home, I was about to look for him when he came in. He was crying.

"You left me," he sobbed.

This was depressing. Darry was acting like a five year old that had gotten lost from his mom in a mall. He was always the strong one. I wanted to cry too. To just lay around and sob while someone brought me soup and told me it was all going to be Ok, but I couldn't do that. I had to be there for Darry.

"I know I left you, Darry," I said. "It won't happen again."

Darry shook his head, "I'm going to bed," he sniffled. Darry walked into his room and locked the door behind him.

I wanted to sleep too, but I couldn't go into my room. It made me think about Pony. I flopped down on the couch and tried to sleep.

I kept thinking about Two-Bit. Why hadn't he shown up at the funeral? Was he really sick?

I was tired; dead tired, but I felt like I should talk to Two-Bit. I couldn't leave Darry though. He was probably asleep; he'd never know. I got up off the couch and headed toward Two-Bit's.

Two-Bit

I was staring at the ceiling. My eyes hurt more than my stomach now. I had a fever; I'd gotten my sister to bring me the thermometer. I didn't have a high fever, it was only 100 or something like that, but it was enough to make me feel bad. I had no energy whatsoever. It was like I had the flu all over again, but I could breathe a bit better.

I saw something moving out of the corner of my eye. I turned over and saw Soda standing there. I checked to make sure that my Mickey Mouse was hidden under the covers. He was.

"Hey, Two-Bit," Soda said hoarsely. I could tell he had been crying.

"Hey," I replied weakly.

"Steve said you were sick," Soda said after an awkward pause. "You look like you don't feel good. What's wrong?"

"Nothing," I muttered.

"If nothing was wrong then you wouldn't be lying around in bed," Soda reasoned.

It was all my fault. I'm the reason Pony's dead. I didn't want to tell Soda yet, I wanted to tell him and Darry at the same time.

But the tears started spilling from my eyes, and I told everything to Soda. About how I was responsible for killing Johnny and Dally and Pony.

"I'm sorry," I sobbed once I was done. "I didn't mean to kill him. Please forgive me!"

Soda just stared at me.

Soda

I believed what Steve had said now. Two-Bit really is sick. He must be delirious or something. He just finished telling me this long story about how he's responsible for Johnny, Dally, and Pony dying. It's completely crazy. Now he's begging me to forgive him for killing Pony. He didn't even do anything.

"I'm sorry, Soda. I'm _sorry!" _Two-Bit sobbed.

"Yeah, it's Ok buddy," I said. "I forgive you. Now try to get some sleep Ok?"

Two-Bit sniffled and nodded. He's really sick; I think he needs a doctor.

Speaking of sick, I wonder how Darry's doing. I left him all alone.

"Hey, Two-Bit I've gotta go," I said. "I'll see you later."

Two-Bit didn't answer. I walked as fast as I could toward home, I hope Darry is Ok.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Two-Bit

I'm so tired.

I haven't eaten in a week. Mom and my sister keep trying to get me to eat some soup, but I'm not hungry. All I want is Savannah. I tried to get up and walk to the pharmacy to see if she was there, but I fell over as soon as I got out of bed. I couldn't get up. I laid there for almost an hour before mom found me.

I'm sick. I want Savannah. Mickey's smile is getting annoying. My stomach hurts so bad.

I moaned softly and muttered "Savannah."

Then mom came into the room. "That's it," she said. "I've had it. I'm staying home from work, you're going to eat, and I'm calling a doctor."

"'Not hungry," I muttered.

"Well that's too damn bad," Mom replied as she flounced out of the room to call the doctor.

The doctor showed up a while later. Mom told him that all I had been doing for the past week was lying in bed.

"Have you been eating?" The doctor asked.

I shook my head.

"He's malnourished," the doctor told my mom.

"He says he's not hungry," my mom replied. "Several of his friends died very close together. Do you think that has anything to do with it?"

"He's depressed," The doctor answered. "I can't help him with that, he needs a psychologist."

After the doctor left mom came back into my room.

"I don't need a psychologist," I said. "I need Savannah."

Mom thought that Savannah was some hallucination brought on by my fever.

"I know you need her, baby," Mom cooed. "Why don't you try to sleep? Maybe she'll be here when you wake up."

"She won't be," I said. "She doesn't know where I live."

I realized how crazy that must have sounded to mom and I started laughing. That really freaked mom out. She brought me a bunch of Aspirin and starting putting cold rags on my forehead. Eventually I fell asleep.

Soda

Darry's gotten a lot better.

He was still asleep when I got home from Two-Bit's that day, so he hadn't noticed I was gone. When he woke up, it was like he had snapped out of it. It was my turn to cry now.

I've stayed home from work for several days. Darry keeps telling me that I can't cry forever, and I know he's right. I just can't help it.

I've moved into Darry's room. I couldn't sleep in the room Pony and I shared. I don't think Darry minds that much.

I still haven't seen Two-Bit. I ran into his mom the other day, and she said he'd gotten worse.

I hope he'll be Ok.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

Two-Bit

"No," I said weakly. Mom was trying to give me some soup, and I didn't want it.

"Yes," mom replied firmly. "I'm tired of you starving yourself. I know you're depressed, but you have to eat."

"I don't want food," I whined. "I want Savannah."

Mom got really quiet and stared at me worriedly. She still doesn't think that Savannah is real. I've tried to tell her that she is, but mom won't listen to me. I'm tired of arguing with her. Actually, I'm just plain tired. I just want to sleep. But I want Savannah too. Which one do I want more?

"You have to eat," mom said.

"Go away," I said. "Let me sleep."

I actually was hungry. I didn't want the soup though. It looked and smelled awful. It was the same stuff that Savannah had made when I was at her house, but everything was better with Savannah. I know that if I could see Savannah I would feel better.

"Mom," I said. She was just starting to leave.

"Yes," mom said hopefully. She was probably hoping that I'd decided to have some soup.

"Bring me Savannah," I whimpered.

"Honey," mom started.

"She works at the pharmacy on the corner," I said. "She has really green eyes, and black hair, and pale skin, and…she's perfect and I love her and I need to see her."

Mom sighed and shook her head. "Fine," she said. "I'll go look for her."

Mom left the room, and a few minutes later I heard the door slam. Maybe I'd finally get to see Savannah. Why had I even left her apartment? If I had known that I was coming back to this; to Pony being dead and to Darry and Soda being so upset then I wouldn't have left, but I didn't know that any of this was happening when I left.

Mom might be a while. I wonder if she's even going to look for Savannah. I curled up in a ball and closed my eyes. I'll take a nap while she's gone. Maybe when mom comes back she'll have Savannah with her. I hope so.

Savannah

I'm bored.

We haven't had many customers today. I've been missing Two-Bit a lot lately. I wonder if he misses me. I wonder if he's Ok.

I heard the door open and I looked up. A woman wearing high heels is walking in. She kind of looks like Two-Bit; she has his hair and his eyes. She walked over to the counter.

"I need to buy some Aspirin," she said.

This is too weird. Aspirin was what Two-Bit wanted when he came here a few weeks ago.

"Sure," I said to the woman at the counter. "I'll be right back." I wonder if Two-Bit is her son.

"Is this all?" I asked when I came back with the Aspirin.

"Yes," the woman replied. She started digging around in her purse.

I wasn't going to ask her, but I heard myself asking "Do you have a son? People call him Two-Bit."

The woman's jaw dropped, she looked up at me, and then to my name tag.

"I don't believe it," she said softly.

"What?" I asked.

The woman shook her head. "Yes," she stammered. "Two-Bit is my son. He's…he's really sick, and he keeps asking for you. I had no idea…I just thought…he has a really high fever and…" The woman's voice trailed off.

"You need to come with me," she said. "He's dying. He won't eat, he can hardly sleep, he keeps asking for you. He needs you."

I was kind of scared. What if this woman was going to kidnap me and then kill me or something? If she really was Two-Bit's mom, and if Two-Bit really was sick then I had to see him. I decided that this woman probably really was Two-Bit's mom. They look a lot alike.

"Let me talk to my boss," I said slowly. "I'll be right back."

I went to my boss and explained, with some fake tears, that I had just gotten the news that my uncle had died. The boss actually bought it. She said she was sorry and to take as much time off as I needed. The boss actually likes me for some reason.

When I got back, Two-Bit's mom was still there. "Ok," I said. "Where's Two-Bit?"


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Two-Bit

I can't breathe.

It's like my body is shutting down, first I couldn't move, then I started hurting really bad, and now I can't breathe. My sister is putting a cold rag on my forehead, but it's not helping. My fever is too high; I don't think anything can make it better. I'm dying. I have to see Savannah before I die. My vision is foggy. I can hardly see my sister, and she's sitting right next to me. She keeps fading in and out.

"Where's mom?" I heard her mutter anxiously. I would have told her, but I'm too weak.

I heard the front door slam and then my sister yelling "Mom! Mom, come quick!"

It sounded like there were two people coming toward my room instead of one. What would I know? I'm almost delirious, I know I am. I heard someone gasp, and then I felt someone sit down on the bed next to me. Then I was being held, and a familiar voice said, "It's OK, Two-Bit. I'm here now."

I looked up and saw Savannah. She was beautiful, just like I remembered her.

"Savannah," I muttered. Then I sighed and everything went black.

Savannah

Two-Bit's eyelids fluttered and then fell closed. His head lolled to one side.

"No," I whispered. I had just gotten here, Two-Bit couldn't be dead.

"Mom!" Two-Bit's sister screamed.

Two-Bit's mom sat down next to me. She picked up his hand and put her fingers on his wrist.

"He still has a pulse," she muttered.

Then I heard Two-Bit moan. His eyes slowly opened and he was looking at me again. His eyes were so sad; there was so much pain in them. He looked scared.

"It's Ok," I said. "You just passed out for a minute, you're gonna be Ok. I'm here now. Everything will be fine."

Two-Bit sighed again and kept looking at me; it looked like he was trying to say something. His lips were moving, but he wasn't saying anything.

"What is it?" I asked.

Two-Bit shook his head and snuggled up against me. He looked so tired.

"Poor thing," I muttered as I stroked Two-Bit's hair. I can't believe I found him.

Two-Bit closed his eyes and eventually dozed off. I tore my eyes off Two-Bit long enough to see his mom standing in the doorway. She walked over to the bed and sat down next to me and Two-Bit.

"I think he'll be fine now," she said. "You're here."


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

Savannah

Two-Bit's mom asked me to stay with them. She thought that Two-Bit would get better sooner if I was there full time. I told her that I could bring Two-Bit to my apartment, but eventually we agreed that Two-Bit wasn't in any condition to move. I told Two-Bit's mom that I would have to go to my apartment to get some of my stuff and find someone to feed my dog. She said to bring the dog with me.

Before I left I went into Two-Bit's room. He was still sleeping; he had been for several hours. I thought about waking him up and telling him that I would be leaving for a little while, but I decided against it.

When I got back to my apartment, I packed a week's worth of clothes, gave Sheba a bath, and took a shower. Then I was back in my car; driving back to Two-Bit's house. Sheba loves car rides; she hung her head out the window the whole way.

Two-Bit was just waking up when I got back. He looked up at me sleepily when I came into his room. Then he smiled. Sheba recognized Two-Bit immediately; she ran over to his bed and jumped on it. I didn't know Sheba could jump anymore. Sheba laid down next to Two-Bit and started licking his ear. Two-Bit scratched Sheba behind her ears.

"She remembers you," I said as I sat down next to Two-Bit.

Two-Bit nodded. He still looked tired.

"She missed you," I said. "I missed you too."

Two-Bit didn't say anything. He just held my hand. I took that as his way of saying "I missed you too."

"Your mom said you haven't been eating," I said. "Are you hungry?"

Two-Bit nodded.

"I'll bring you some soup," I said. "I'll be right back."

Two-Bit

Savannah is here. She's finally here. She even brought her dog.

She's getting me some soup now; I'm starving. I can tell she's worried about me; so is my mom, but she doesn't matter; not as much as Savannah.

I'm too weak to eat the soup by myself; Savannah had to feed it to me. I ended up eating three bowls of it. Once I was done eating, Savannah came back and cuddled me.

"I was so worried about you," She said. "You just disappeared, and then there was that story in the paper about that boy killing himself. I was afraid that you might be dead too. Then you could have hurt yourself…I guess you kind of did, but not too badly. Then I was talking to your mom, and I found out that that kid that killed himself was a friend of yours and…"

Savannah's voice trailed off. I could hear her crying.

"It's Ok," I muttered. "You're here now. I'll be alright."

"And then when you were staying with me before you kept having these nightmares about killing someone," Savannah sobbed. "I didn't know what to think."

"'Tell you about that later," I muttered. "I'm too tired now."

"Ok," Savannah said.

Savannah held me until I fell asleep.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

Two-Bit

I'm still sick.

It's been a few days since Savannah got here. My fever went down, and I'm not anywhere near as weak as I was before, but I still don't feel good. Mom and Savannah have been trying to get me out of bed; they don't want me to do much, they just want me to walk around the house or something. I just don't feel like it though.

I guess it's not so much that I'm sick; it's that I'm depressed. Now that I'm not thinking so much about how much my head hurts, or hungry I am, I've started feeling guilty again. I wish that Ponyboy wasn't dead. Now that he's gone, I realized that he's probably the only person on Earth that I could have related to and talked about Johnny's death with. Now he's dead. What am I gonna do?

I've heard about people cutting themselves. They say that it really helps with the pain. Normally I would just drink, but there's no way that I could get a beer now. I've been pretending that I have a really bad headache that won't go away so I can have Aspirin. It doesn't do that much, but it helps me sleep.

My knife is hidden under the mattress. I used to have a really nice switchblade, but I gave it to Dally, and then the cops took it when he died. I stole a new one though.

I flipped the knife open. I'd used it several times. When we won the rumble, the Socs said that they would stay out of our territory, but they didn't. I hate Socs. I hate myself.

I was about to cut my wrist with the knife, just to see what it felt like, but Savannah came in. I quickly hid my knife. I was stupid to even think about cutting. She and mom have been watching me like hawks ever since I tried to smoke in bed and almost set the sheets on fire.

"Hey," Savannah said as she sat down next to me. She always sounds so happy.

"Hey," I replied less happily. I love Savannah, but I'm just so depressed.

"What's wrong?" Savannah asked. "Is your head still hurting?"

I nodded. I hated lying to Savannah, but it was the easiest thing to do. I didn't want to explain everything to her.

Savannah started stroking my hair. I like it when she does that. It almost makes me forget about how depressed I am. After a while she stopped.

"Now does your head feel better?" Savannah asked.

"No," I said. My head felt fine, I just wanted an Aspirin.

"I'm sorry," Savannah said softly. She really was sorry, I could tell.

"Do you want an Aspirin?" Savannah asked.

I nodded.

"Why don't you go get it?" Savannah asked. "You need some exercise."

I don't want to walk all the way to the kitchen. It's not that far, but it seems like it. It would make Savannah happy though. I slowly got out of bed. Savannah let me lean against her. We'd only gone a few steps when I decided that I didn't want to walk all the way to the kitchen. I stopped.

"I'm dizzy," I said softly.

Savannah hugged me for a few minutes, but it didn't change my mind. I just want to lie down; she can bring me the Aspirin.

"'Still dizzy," I said after a few minutes.

Savannah helped me back into bed. Then she kissed my cheek and went to get my Aspirin.

Savannah

I'm worried about Two-Bit.

He's gotten a bit better since I've been here, but only physically. He seems depressed. He says that he has a headache that won't go away, but I don't believe him. I think that he just wants the Aspirin. His mom and I are worried that he might be kind of addicted to it.

I've been trying to get Two-Bit to get up and walk around the house some; I think it would be good for him. Usually he says that he doesn't feel good, but today he actually got out of bed. He only walked a few steps before he started complaining that he was dizzy. The dizziness didn't go away, and he had to lie down again. When I brought him his Aspirin though, he seemed fine.

I just don't know what to think. I've been talking to his mom a lot. She said that Two-Bit is normally really witty and funny, and that moping around isn't like him. The closest he got to seeming better was when he tried to smoke in bed a few days ago. He almost caught the sheets on fire.

I'm checking on Two-Bit again. He's asleep, holding a stuffed animal Mickey Mouse. He tries to make sure that no one sees it. Apparently he's done a good job because when his mom saw it yesterday she said "Oh, I remember this. I had no idea he still had it."

It seems like Two-Bit doesn't care about anything when I'm around him. I'm the only one that he doesn't hide the Mickey Mouse stuffed animal from. He's cried a few times in front of me. His friends came over once while he was crying, he really quickly stopped crying and started making jokes. I could tell that the whole time he was joking that he was hurting, and that the whole time he was laughing he wanted to be crying.

I wish that Two-Bit would tell me what's wrong. I want to help him, but he won't let me.

Why won't he let me help him?


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

Two-Bit

All those people that said that cutting makes you feel better were wrong. It just makes you hurt even more.

I watched the drops of blood drip down my wrist. Sheba, who had been asleep next to me woke up and looked at my wrist. She made this confused woofing sound and then started licking the blood off my wrist. It stung. I pulled my wrist away. Sheba gave me a confused look and then jumped off the bed. She was probably going to get Savannah. Sheba thinks she's Lassie or something; she's constantly leaving the room and then coming back with Savannah.

Sure enough, Savannah came in a few minutes later. My wrist was still bleeding. Savannah sat down next to me and started putting tissues on my cut wrist. She was squeezing my wrist; probably trying to make the bleeding stop.

"What'd you cut yourself with?" Savannah asked.

I took my knife out from under the sheets where I'd hidden it. There were still a few drops of blood on it. I handed it to Savannah. She looked at it, wiped the blood off on her jeans, and then closed the knife and put it in her pocket. Then she got up and left the room.

Savannah came back in with a bottle of Peroxide and some band-aids. She cleaned my wrist and then put the band-aids on it. I expected Savannah to tell me that she was disappointed that I cut myself or tell me that she and mom would have to send me to an asylum, but she didn't. Savannah just held me and talked to me quietly.

What's wrong with me? I hate being depressed. I want to stop being depressed, but I just can't. Maybe I just need a change of scenery. If I could go back to Savannah's apartment I would feel better.

Savannah

Two-Bit is staring off into space. I've been talking to him for a while, but he's not responding. It's like to him I'm not even there.

I can't believe he cut himself. I'm afraid to tell his mom, she might send him away to an asylum. Sending him away is probably the worst thing to do. He just needs to get away from the east side. I think that he'd feel a lot better after spending a few days at my apartment. This side of town has too many bad memories for him.

"Two-Bit," I said softly.

"Yeah," he replied. He finally answered me.

"Once you get a bit better, you're coming to live with me, Ok?" I said.

Two-Bit smiled and nodded, "You don't have to ask twice," he said.

I smiled too, and started stroking Two-Bit's hair. He closed his eyes, but he kept smiling at me.

"You're beautiful, you know that?" Two-Bit said.

I laughed, "You must still be sick. You're delirious."

Two-Bit didn't say anything for a long time. After about a half hour of silence, I heard the front door open, and then close. Then Two-Bit's mom was standing in the doorway.

"How's he doing?" She asked as she sat down next to me.

"Better," I replied. I decided not to tell her about Two-Bit coming to live with me until later.

"What happened to his wrist?" Two-Bit's mom asked worriedly.

"Oh, that," I said. "He was playing with Sheba, and she got sort of carried away and bit him. It's not too bad, but it was bleeding a little so I put a band-aid on it."

"Alright," Two-Bit's mom said. "I have to go to work soon. Keep an eye on him for me."

"Sure," I said as Two-Bit's mom left the room.

After Two-Bit's mom left the room, Two-Bit muttered "Thanks."

"What?" I asked.

But Two-Bit didn't answer, he just shook his head. I kept asking him what he meant, but he still didn't answer me. He didn't talk to me for the rest of the night.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter Eighteen

Author's Note: I'm finally back! I know Two-Bit is really depressed in this chapter, but the story has a happy ending.

Two-Bit

I'm going to tell Savannah about my dream today.

I don't want to, but I think I should. She probably kept me from going to an asylum. Mom asked about my wrist, and instead of telling her that I'd cut myself, Savannah said that Sheba bit me. Mom bought it too.

It's ten now. I've been awake since seven trying to get myself ready to tell Savannah everything. I don't think I'll ever be ready though. I wish she'd come in now so I could get it over with.

Savannah came in then and sat down next to me.

"Good morning," She said softly. I think she could tell that something was up.

"Hey," I said.

"Are you feeling Ok?" She asked. "You seem kind of nervous."

"I have something to tell you," I said quietly. "It's about the dreams I had."

For the next hour I told Savannah everything, starting with that night at the nightly double, and ending yesterday, when I'd cut myself. When I was done talking I was exhausted. I laid back against the pillow and closed my eyes. Savannah didn't say anything. I wished she would, I wanted to know what she thought. I'd been laying there with my eyes closed for several minutes when I felt Savannah move. I thought she was getting up; either to call the police or an asylum, but then I felt Savannah holding me. I opened my eyes and saw that Savannah was laying next to me, holding me. She'd never done that before.

"I'm sorry," Savannah said. There was a long pause before she continued. "You didn't deserve any of that. That must have been so terrible. You said you actually saw one of them…Dally, you actually saw him die?"

I nodded. "The police shot him," I said softly. I closed my eyes to try to keep the tears back. I shouldn't have brought this up. I should have never told Savannah anything. Savannah kept on talking.

"I could never have done that," Savannah said. "What you did. Not talking to anyone about my friends dying. I would have killed myself. I don't know how you lived this long. It's been almost a year since they died, right?"

I nodded. It was quiet for a long time before Savannah started talking again.

"I'm just so sorry," She said. "And you're not responsible for them dying. It's not your fault."

I was quiet for a long time, I was trying so hard not to cry that I was sort of shaking. Why am I trying not to cry? Savannah is the only one here besides mom. Savannah doesn't care, I don't have to act tough around her.

"Two-Bit," Savannah said. "What's wrong? You're shivering."

I opened my eyes and looked at Savannah. I've told her everything, I don't have anything to hide from her. I could feel the tears stinging my eyes like a thousand tiny needles. I screamed and then started sobbing. I buried my face in Savannah's hair and cried.

"Two-Bit," Savannah said softly. She didn't finish whatever she was going to say. She just held me.

I cried and cried. I couldn't stop. Why did I even talk to Savannah? Remembering Johnny and Dally hurt so much. Every few minutes a wave of grief would hit me. I would half scream and half moan whenever that happened. Savannah held me, that was all. She didn't try to comfort me, and I didn't want her to. I didn't want anyone to talk to me, I just wanted to cry.

I completely lost any sense of time. I was just laying in a black void, drowning in memories and grief. I cried for Johnny and Dally and Pony, but mostly I cried for myself; for what I was, and for what I'd become. Sometimes the tears would stop, and I would have a flashback to when everyone in the gang was alive, when I was still the gang joker; before any of this happened. Then the flashback would end and I would cry again. Savannah left the room at some point.

I woke up once and Soda was sitting next to me. I think Steve and Darry were there too, but I don't remember. Seeing them made me remember, and remembering made me hurt. I closed my eyes and rolled over so my back was to them and cried. Soda, good old Soda, tried to calm me down and make me quit crying, but nothing would work. After a while he gave up and left. Steve and Darry left with him, if they were even there at all.

Mom came in and tried to comfort me too. I don't know how long she was there, I don't remember what she said, I don't remember if I said anything back. I just remember crying, the flashbacks, and screaming whenever the pain from the memories was too much to bear.

Savannah came back later. The room was dark and I was cowering under the blankets. Mickey Mouse had been thrown across the room during a fit that I don't remember having. Savannah bent down and picked up my Mickey Mouse and brought him over to me. She put the stuffed animal in my arms.

"Think you've been crying long enough?" She asked. Her voice was soft, soothing, quiet.

And then all the grief and all the pain was gone. It was replaced with fatigue; I'd never been so tired. I was also thirsty. I looked up at Savannah, and I was about to ask her if she would get me some water but I never got the chance. Sleep hit me like a tidal wave, and I was instantly unconscious.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter Nineteen

Two-Bit

I woke up at around noon.

Savannah was sitting next to me. I was thirsty; I tapped Savannah on the shoulder to get her attention. She jumped, and then she saw that I was awake.

"Hey," she said. "Are you Ok?"

"I'm thirsty," I croaked. My throat was dry.

"OK," Savannah said. "I'll be right back."

Savannah left the room, and I laid back against my pillows. I felt a lot better after crying; it was like a huge weight had been taken off my chest.

I had another dream about Johnny last night. He was sitting next to me. I could see tear stains on my face, and I was sniffing a lot, like I'd been crying. Johnny was shaking his head and sort of laughing at me.

"What?" I asked him.

"Nothing," Johnny said. Then after a few seconds he said, "You're way too hard on yourself."

"Huh?" I asked.

"You didn't do anything," Johnny said. "So stop beating yourself up."

"But you told me that I killed you," I said. "I had all those nightmares about you telling me that I killed you."

Johnny shook his head. "You're crazy," he said. "You didn't do anything, so stop worrying about it."

We were quiet for a long time, then Johnny said "So, do you believe me? You didn't do anything."

"Yeah," I said. "Savannah said that too."

"Yeah," Johnny said. He smiled, "Her, she likes you."

"I know," I said.

"Well, if you believe me, then I'll be going," Johnny said. "Oh, and Ponyboy and Dally say hi."

"Tell them I miss them," I said.

"I will," Johnny said. He was starting to disappear. "Bye Two-Bit."

"Bye," I said. I realized that I was talking to thin air, Johnny was gone. Then I woke up.

I came back to reality. I could hear footsteps coming down the hallway. I opened my eyes and looked up. Savannah was there, holding a glass of Pepsi. Soda and Steve were standing in the doorway. Savannah handed me the Pepsi.

"Steve and Soda are here to see you," Savannah said. "Do you want to talk to them?"

I nodded. Savannah nodded at Steve and Soda, and they came into the room.

"Hey buddy," Soda said.

"Hey," I replied.

We were quiet for a while, and then Soda said "So…what was wrong with you yesterday? Are you Ok?"

I didn't want to tell Soda and Steve the whole story of why I was so depressed, at least not yet, so I didn't say much.

"I was upset about some stuff," I said. "I had to get it off my chest."

"What was bothering you?" Soda asked.

I didn't answer him, I didn't want to.

"We're just worried about you," Soda said.

"I felt guilty," I said.

"About what?" Soda asked.

"Johnny, and Dally, and Pony," I said, pausing for a long time after each of their names.

"What?" Steve asked.

"I…I felt responsible because they died," I said softly.

"Why?" Steve asked.

I was getting sick of Soda and Steve asking me questions. They were asking me questions that I wasn't ready to answer, at least not to them. Savannah was sitting next to me. I leaned my head against her shoulder and closed my eyes.

"Look," I said. "I have a headache. Just…come back tomorrow. I'll talk to you then."

My eyes were still closed, but I could tell that Soda and Steve weren't leaving.

"You don't have a headache," Soda said.

It was true, I didn't have a headache, but I wanted them to go away. "Yes I do," I lied. "I have a really bad headache."

"Yeah right," Steve said, "Soda, we're late for work. Let's go."

Then Soda and Steve left. I know that they're my friends, but I didn't want to talk to them. I just wanted Savannah.

"Do you really have a headache?" Savannah asked.

I was thinking about saying yes, just to get her to feel sorry for me, but I didn't. "No," I said. "I don't have a headache. I just wanted them to go away. I wasn't ready to talk to them yet."

Savannah pulled me closer to her and started stroking my hair. "That's fine," she said. "You don't have to talk to them."

I sat next to Savannah, just enjoying the closeness. I was finally feeling better. I realized that this was probably the only time that Savannah and I had been together and I hadn't been helpless because I was sick, or so depressed that I was about to cry, or sobbing my eyes out. I remembered what Johnny had said in my dream "she likes you". My head was on Savannah's shoulder, I moved it a little. I sat still for a minute, deciding if I should do what I wanted to do or not. I finally decided on yes, and I gently kissed Savannah. She looked at me and smiled.

"What was that for?" she asked. She was half laughing.

"For being wonderful," I said.

Savannah kissed my forehead. "Go back to sleep," she said. "You're imagining things because you're so tired."

"'Not tired," I said, even though I was. "You really are wonderful."

"Ok, baby," Savannah said. "Whatever you say."

Soda

Steve was really mad.

He was stalking around the DX, snapping at all the customers that asked him for help. He kicked three cars and almost dented them. Now the boss is talking to him. I hope he doesn't get fired.

I was taking a break, drinking a can of Coke when Steve came up to me.

"Hey," he said as he sat down next to me.

"Hey," I said. "What did the boss do to you?"

"Nothing," Steve said. "He just told me to take the rest of the day off, he didn't want me to ruin any of the cars or scare away the customers."

I nodded and took another drink from my Coke.

"Two-Bit has gotten really annoying," Steve continued. "I know he was sick, but what was up with him crying yesterday? And then he didn't want to talk to us today, he could have just said so. But no, he lied to us, pretended that he had a headache. It just makes me mad."

"I dunno," I said. "Maybe he's still sick."

"He's been sick for more than three weeks," Steve said. "He's fine; he just doesn't want to see us."

"I'm going back to his house after work," I said. "Maybe he'll talk to me then. Do you want to come?"

Steve stood up. "No," he said flatly. He started walking away and he lit a cigarette. "I'll see you later," he said.

I stood up and started walking over to a car that had just pulled in. It was going to be a long day without Steve there to help. Maybe the boss would close early; then I would get to see Two-Bit sooner.

I wonder what's wrong with him.


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter Twenty

Two-Bit

I was lying in bed, half asleep. Savannah and I had been talking for a long time. I realized that I hardly knew anything about Savannah. Normally, that wouldn't have bothered me; I'd been out with plenty of girls and not even known their last name. I wanted to know everything about her though. I was thinking about what she had just told me. Her full name is Savannah Marie Adams, she's 5'6", and she's 19, a bit older than me. She graduated high school when she was 17, but she didn't want to go to college. Her brother owns the apartment complex that she lives in, he's really rich so he pays her rent. Savannah just works in a pharmacy for money to buy groceries and stuff. She used to play the flute, but then she stopped. She's left handed…

I sounded stupid when I told her about me. My real name is Keith Matthews, just over 6 feet tall, 18 and still a junior in high school because I only go to school when I feel like it. I have a record with the police, and I drink a lot.

Savannah sat next to me and held me for a while once we were done talking. I saw her flinch a bit when I told her that I had a record with the police, but after she let that sink in for a while I don't think it bothered her. Now that I think about it, Savannah is way too good for me, but I love her so much.

Savannah had been out taking Sheba for a walk. I heard someone coming toward my room. I thought it was Savannah. I opened my eyes, thinking that I would be looking at Savannah. I jumped; it wasn't Savannah.

It was Soda.

Soda

Two-Bit opened his eyes, saw me, and jumped. He rubbed his eyes.

"Sorry," he said. "You scared me, I was asleep."

"It's Ok," I said.

We sat in silence for a while, Two-Bit was rubbing his eyes and shaking his head; trying to wake up.

"So, Two-Bit," I said after a while, "What's wrong?"

"I'm tired is what's wrong," Two-Bit said. "I just got to sleep."

"That's not really what I meant," I said. "Why were you crying yesterday?"

"I know what you meant," Two-Bit snapped. Then he shook his head. "I'm sorry," he said. "I'm just so tired, and I don't feel good."

"If you want me to leave, just tell me, I'll go," I said. Two-Bit was doing it again: making excuses, trying to avoid having to talk.

Two-Bit didn't say anything, so I started talking again. "We're just worried about you," I said. "You're not acting like yourself, and you've been sick for way too long. Then Darry and I were talking yesterday, and we realized that pretty much ever since Johnny and Dally died you haven't been acting right. You kept making jokes and everything, but it seemed like you were trying too hard, like you had to force yourself to laugh. You never had to do that before. Then for the past few months it seemed like every time I saw you, you were drinking a bottle of beer."

"I was depressed," Two-Bit said.

"So why didn't you tell us?" I asked.

"I didn't want to bother you," Two-Bit said. "You were trying to handle your own grief, so why should you have to handle mine too? I kept joking and everything to make you guys feel better, but it got harder and harder to act happy because I got more and more depressed. So, I started drinking more, a lot more. I would be drunk by nine in the morning, and then when I felt the beer starting to wear off, I would just drink more. It helped me feel less depressed, I could make jokes easier, but I couldn't get through the day without booze, and I needed a lot of it. Finally, I got the flu one day, and Savannah took care of me."

"Is Savannah the girl that's been living here?" I asked. I'd seen her before, but I didn't know her name.

"Yeah," Two-Bit said. "She's the love of my life."

We were quiet for a while, and then Two-Bit started talking again. "It's probably a good thing I got sick," Two-Bit continued. "I was about to kill myself, either with the drinking or by suicide. And if I hadn't gotten sick then I wouldn't have met Savannah."

"You really like her?" I asked.

Two-Bit shook his head. "I love her," he said.

"So, are you better now?" I asked after a short silence. "You weren't acting like you felt too great a few days ago."

"I'm better," Two-Bit said. "More or less better at least. I'm not feeling really guilty anymore; crying made me feel a lot better. Savannah makes me feel a lot better." Two-Bit smiled, "She likes me. She's way too good for me, but she likes me. I love her."

"I guess you should know that I'm leaving tomorrow," Two-Bit said. "I'm going to live with Savannah. I need to get away from the East side. I'll call you or something."

I nodded. "We'll miss you, buddy," I said.

"Yeah," Two-Bit said. "I'll miss you guys too, but I just need to get out of here, you understand."

"Yeah," I said, even though I didn't. "Well, you look sort of tired. I'll leave now, sorry I woke you up."

"It's alright," Two-Bit said.

"Bye," I said as I left.

"Bye," Two-Bit said.

As I was leaving, I saw Savannah. She was heading back to Two-Bit's room with a glass of Coke. She's pretty, and she looks like the type that wouldn't cheat. I can see why he likes her.

I hope they have a good life together.


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter Twenty-One

Savannah

Two-Bit is doing a lot better.

When he first got here he was still sort of sick and depressed. He also felt bad for leaving his friends, but after a while he got over it. He got a job at a grocery store. He hates it, but he doesn't quit because he wants to help me pay for groceries and stuff.

I'll admit that when Two-Bit told me about his police record I wasn't so sure that I wanted him to live with me anymore. Then he told me that all the things he was arrested for happened when he was drunk, and most of the times happened after Johnny and Dally died. He had been drinking to try to make himself feel better. Then I felt sorry for him.

Now that Two-Bit is feeling better, he's always making jokes. I'm always laughing about something he said or did. He's obsessed with watching Mickey Mouse, but he gave the Mickey Mouse stuffed animal to Sheba; she likes to chew on it. I asked Two-Bit why he didn't want the stuffed animal anymore, and he said he didn't need it.

"I have you now," Two-Bit had said. "Why would I need some stupid stuffed animal when I have you?"

Two-Bit really loves me. He stopped drinking because I hate the smell of beer. It wasn't easy for him to stop drinking either, and I think he still drinks some when he's at work, but he doesn't drink at the apartment, and he never comes home drunk, so that's good enough for me.

I wonder where Two-Bit is now. He's usually home from work by now. Sheba was chewing on the Mickey Mouse stuffed animal, but she got up and ran toward the door. Then I heard someone opening the door and Sheba barking happily.

Two-Bit was home.

"Hey, baby," Two-Bit said as he came in. He was holding something behind his back.

"Hey," I said.

Two-Bit sat down on the couch next to me. "'Got something for you," he said. Then he showed me what it was.

It was a bouquet of red roses. "I love you so much," Two-Bit said.

"I love you too," I said.

Two-Bit put the roses on the coffee table, and the next thing I knew he was kissing me. I kissed him back.

Two-Bit and I cuddled on the couch for a while after the kiss. We were sort of watching the news, but I wasn't paying much attention because it's so depressing, and Two-Bit would kiss my cheek every minute or so.

"Savannah," Two-Bit said.

"Yeah," I replied.

"Let's get married," Two-Bit said.

I laughed "When?" I asked.

"Tomorrow," Two-Bit said.

I laughed, and Two-Bit kissed me again.

"I'm serious," Two-Bit said after we kissed. "Let's get married tomorrow."

"'Can't" I said. "My brother is out of town. I'd want him to be there."

"Why does your stupid brother have to be there?" Two-Bit whined. "I wanna marry you now."

"Because if it wasn't for my 'stupid brother' then we wouldn't have a place to live," I said.

Two-Bit was quiet for a while. Then he said "When does your brother get back in town?"

"Next week," I said.

"So could we get married then?" Two-Bit asked.

"Sure," I said.

Two-Bit kissed me again. We kissed for a long time.


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter Twenty-Two

Author's note: These are the last few chapters. They're all pretty short, they're all from Two-Bit's POV, and they happen a few years in the future after the rest of the story. It says how many years later at the beginning of the chapter. Thank you for all the reviews, and I hope you enjoy these last few chapters.

One Year Later

Two-Bit

Savannah and I are married now.

That night a year ago, we were both just joking about getting married when her brother got back in town. But I loved Savannah so much, and she loved me. We were already living together, so we decided to get married.

It was probably the most casual wedding ceremony in the history of casual wedding ceremonies. I wore jeans and a T-shirt, and Savannah wore this white skirt and top. The only people there were Savannah's brother and his wife, Darry, Soda, and Steve. Then there was the minister guy, who was one of Savannah's neighbors. We didn't even have a cake, just cookies.

We honeymooned in Florida though. It sucked. I had never been to the beach before, and I didn't listen to Savannah when she told me to put on sunscreen. I got a really bad sunburn, and then Savannah and I ate at this seafood place and we both got food poisoning. It was horrible then, but Savannah and I are both laughing about it now.

Savannah got a really good job as a receptionist at a doctor's office, it pays really well so I could have stopped working if I wanted to, but I felt like I should make some money. I never bought Savannah a ring, and I want to get her one. Now I'm working at the DX with Steve and Soda. It's a lot better than my other job; I hated that stupid grocery store.

I love Savannah even more now than before. She feels the same way about me. Our life together has been perfect, except for one thing. Sheba died a month ago. She was really old and she was having a lot of joint problems. One day she was lying down, and she couldn't get up. Savannah took her to the vet, and the vet decided the best thing to do would be to put Sheba to sleep. Savannah was heartbroken, she cried for several days. Then Soda found these kittens that someone had abandoned in an alley. There were five of them, and I took two of them to give to Savannah. She hated them at first; she was still really upset about Sheba dying. But then one day I came home from work, and Savannah was sitting on the couch with both the kittens curled up in her lap. She's loved them ever since. She named them Paul and John because she's obsessed with the Beatles.

Savannah is at work now, but she should be coming home soon. I'm sitting on the couch; half watching Mickey Mouse and half watching the kittens. Savannah gave them this ball to play with, it has a bell in it, so whenever they roll the ball, the bell rings. The kittens are obsessed with it, and it's really funny to watch them play with it.

I heard Savannah trying to get the door open. I ran over to the door and hid behind it. Savannah walked in and closed the door. I was standing behind her.

"Hey," I said.

Savannah screamed and turned around. Then she saw it was me and not someone trying to rob the apartment.

"Don't do that," Savannah said. "You're going to give me a heart attack, and then I'll be dead and you'll be really sad."

"I won't give you a heart attack," I said.

I pulled Savannah close to me and kissed her. "I love you," I muttered. Then I kissed Savannah again.

I love her so much.


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter Twenty-Three

Three Years Later

Two-Bit

"You're really happy today," Soda said.

It was true, I was. I'd been dancing around work all day; the boss asked me if I was high.

"Yeah," I said. Then I did a cartwheel.

"What's your problem?" Soda laughed.

"Nothing," I said as I did a handstand. I walked around on my hands for a while, and then I lost my balance and fell over. It hurt, but I started laughing. I couldn't help it, I was so happy.

"Two-Bit, what's going on?" Soda asked. "Are you drunk?"

"No," I said as I flopped down on the pavement next to Soda.

"Then what's going on?" Soda asked.

"Where's Steve?" I asked.

"He should be here soon," Soda said.

After about five minutes, Steve showed up. He sat down next to me and Soda.

"What's up?" He asked.

"I think Two-Bit is drunk," Soda said.

"No," I said. "I'm not drunk. I'm just really happy."

"Then what's going on?" Steve asked.

I smiled, "Savannah's having a baby," I said.

"You're the father?" Steve asked.

"Of course I'm the father," I said.

"Congratulations buddy," Soda said. Then he handed me a cigarette. "I think you're supposed to smoke cigars when something like this happens, but I don't have any cigars, so we'll use cigarettes."

We sat there and smoked for a while, it was a really slow day. It was a good thing that it was a slow day though because my mind wasn't on work. All I could think about was Savannah.

I left work as soon as I could. I wanted to get home. Savannah hadn't been feeling very well, and I was worried about her.

When I got home Savannah was lying on the couch, watching TV.

"Hey," I said.

"Hey," Savannah said sleepily. She sat up. I sat down, and then Savannah laid back down, using my lap as a pillow.

"How are you feeling?" I asked as I rubbed Savannah's back.

"Not too good," She said. "I called my mom today; she said that I was supposed to be feeling bad. It sucks."

"I didn't go to work today," Savannah said. "I just couldn't get out of bed."

"I know," I said softly. "It's Ok."

"Remember when I was really sick a few years ago?" I asked.

"Yeah," Savannah said.

"You took care of me," I said. "Now I'm gonna take care of you, and I'm gonna take care of the baby too, so don't worry about anything."

"Thanks," Savannah said. She sounded tired.

I rubbed Savannah's back for a while. Then I asked, "Are you hungry? Do you want dinner?"

"Too tired to eat," She said.

I made Savannah eat some soup and drink some orange juice. I didn't want her to get sick. Savannah fell asleep on the couch while I was taking a shower. I didn't want to wake her up, so I picked her up, carried her to our room, and put her on the bed. Then I put the covers around her and I crawled into bed next to her.

I looked at Savannah. It's been three years since I met her and she's still beautiful. If anything, she's even more beautiful. If I still lived on the east side, I wouldn't have been happy if one of my girlfriends was having a baby. But I'm not on the east side anymore, and Savannah isn't my girlfriend, she's my wife. I'm so happy that she's having a baby, and so is she even though she's sick most mornings because of it. The doctor said that it wouldn't be as bad after a month or so.

I turned off the light and laid down next to Savannah. I put my arm around her.

"Good night, Savannah," I whispered, even though I knew she couldn't hear me. "I love you."

I drifted off to sleep, dreaming about Savannah and the baby.


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter Twenty-Four

Six months later

Two-Bit

"Congratulations," the nurse said as she handed the baby to Savannah. "It's a boy."

I kissed Savannah on the cheek. "I love you," I said.

"You've told me," Savannah said.

We named the baby Jonathan Dallas, after two of my best friends. I wanted to add Ponyboy in the name, but Savannah wouldn't let me. My friends that he's named after died way too early, I hope he doesn't.

Savannah had fallen asleep, I wanted to stay at the hospital, but the doctors told me to go home. I eventually left. When I went back to the hospital the next morning Savannah was awake, but she wasn't too happy about the hospital food.

"This stuff sucks," she said as she poked at what I think was supposed to be eggs. "Most people are here to get better and I'm a new mom, do they really expect me to eat this crap?"

I left the hospital and got Savannah some real food.

"Thank you!" Savannah said happily as she ate a biscuit and some orange juice that I'd gotten her from a McDonalds down the street. "You're a Saint."

"You didn't think that yesterday," I said.

"Yeah," Savannah said. "I kind of screamed at you. I'm sorry."

"You _kind of _screamed at me," I said. I think that patients on the next floor could hear her.

"Ok, I screamed at you a lot," Savannah said. "I'm sorry."

"It's Ok," I said.

When Savannah was done eating, I took her to see the baby. I kind of got in trouble for pushing her down the hall really fast in one of those hospital wheelchairs. We both thought it was funny.

The baby was in this nursery thing with about twenty other babies. There was a window between us and the babies. There were several other couples looking at their kids through the window.

"There he is," Savannah said when she found our kid.

We were quiet for a while; then Savannah said "He's beautiful."

"Yeah," I said. "Just like his mom."

We were quiet for a while, and then I said "He does look exactly like me though."

"Oh no," Savannah groaned. We both started laughing. The other couples gave us a look that said 'be quiet'. That just made us laugh harder.

Later that day, Savannah was napping and I was sitting in a chair next to her bed, reading the paper. I wasn't really paying much attention until I saw an article with the title "Increased teen suicides worry adults". I read the article, it was really depressing. It made me think back to when Johnny and Dally and Pony had just died. I had wanted to kill myself.

I put down the paper and looked at Savannah. If I had killed myself, I would have missed so much. I would have never met Savannah, and I wouldn't have known what it was like to be a dad. It feels good to be alive.

I started thinking about Dally and Pony. They'll never know any of what I'm feeling now. I feel sorry for them. I realized that I'd never been to visit their graves. Savannah was still asleep. I decided that now would be a good time to go.

I got to the cemetery and wandered around for a while. I found Dally's grave first. I stood next to the headstone and kicked at the dirt.

"Hey Dally," I said. Then I laughed. "Wow, I feel stupid. Anyway, I read this thing in the paper today and it made me think about you, so I decided to come visit. I'm married now to this girl named Savannah, she's…I don't know how to describe her, but I love her. We just had a kid together, Jonathan Dallas; he kind of has your name. I just wanted to say I'm sorry you had to die. We miss you."

I walked away from Dally's grave. I felt stupid for talking to nothing, but maybe he could hear me somehow. I eventually found Pony's grave. I sat down next to it.

"Hey Pony," I said. "We miss you, kid. You had so much going for you. Why'd you have to kill yourself? It's because you felt guilty, right? I felt really guilty too, but things worked out better for me. I'm not trying to rub it in your face or anything, but they did. I met this girl, Savannah, she's not a Grease either, she's kind of a Soc. Anyway, I love her; we got married and just had a kid. I wanted to name him Ponyboy, kind of like a middle name but Savannah wouldn't let me. I wish you hadn't killed yourself, now you'll never know what it's like to have a kid, or be in love or anything. It feels pretty good. I know, you're thinking, 'Wow, Two-Bit is actually saying something serious.' Yeah, but I just wanted to tell you how I feel, and this is how I feel so…"

"Two-Bit," I heard someone say.

I turned around. Soda and Darry were standing there with a bunch of flowers.

"Hey," I said as I stood up.

"What are you doing here?" Soda asked.

I laughed, "I don't really know," I said. "I read this thing in the paper today and it made me think about Pony, so I decided to come visit him."

"How's Savannah doing?" Soda asked.

"Fine," I said. "She hates the hospital food though. The baby is doing good too."

"Shouldn't you be with her?" Soda asked.

"Yeah," I said. "I don't really know what I'm doing here. I should be back at the hospital with her, or at home. I haven't slept in…I don't know how long."

We stood there in awkward silence for a while. Then I said, "Well, you guys probably want to be alone and I should be getting back to Savannah. We'll call you when we get the baby home from the hospital, you can come over and see him."

"'Looking forward to it," Soda said. "Bye, Two-Bit."

"Bye," I said.

I left the cemetery and hurried toward the hospital. I didn't want Savannah to wake up and see that I was gone.

When I got back to the hospital, Savannah was still asleep. I sat down in a chair and waited until she woke up.

"Hey," she said when she woke up. "How are you?"

"Fine," I said.

"You look tired," Savannah said. "Why don't you go home and try to get some sleep? I'll be alright."

I nodded. "Ok," I said.

I left the hospital and wandered around the parking garage until I found my car, then I drove home.

The cats were really happy to see me; they rubbed against my legs and purred really loud. I fed them and then went into my room. I flopped down on the bed and closed my eyes, I was so tired. Then I heard a voice that said "Tired?"

I opened my eyes and looked around the room.

"You didn't visit me," the voice said. "I'm insulted."

"Johnny?" I asked.

I heard someone laughing, "Yeah, it's me." Johnny said.

"Where are you?" I asked.

"That's not important," Johnny said. "I just wanted to talk to you for a while."

"Ok," I said.

"Thanks for naming your kid after me," Johnny said. "Savannah really loves you."

"I really love her," I said.

"I was kind of upset that you didn't visit me when you went to see Dally and Pony," Johnny said.

"I'm sorry," I said. "I wasn't thinking."

"Yeah, I know," Johnny said. "Well, I just wanted to say congratulations. I never thought you would have a kid, or get married."

"Neither did I," I laughed.

"So I guess you're not depressed anymore," Johnny said.

"No," I said. "Far from it."

"You look tired," Johnny said. "I'll let you sleep. Bye Two-Bit."

"Bye Johnny," I said.

The room was quiet. "Johnny," I said. "Johnny?"

There was no response; I guessed that I was hallucinating because I was so tired.

I closed my eyes. I was tired, but something told me that I hadn't imagined my conversation with Johnny. I promised myself that I would visit Johnny's grave, and I would take the baby and Savannah with me. They should meet him.

I started thinking about how much I've changed. Before Johnny and Dally died I didn't care about anything. I would go out and get drunk and not care about anything. Then they died and I started getting depressed, I would drink to forget; I got arrested ten times. Then I got really sick and then Pony died. Pony dying pushed me off the edge, I completely burned out. I was about to die too, but Savannah came. She probably saved my life.

Now I'm living with Savannah, and we have a kid. I never wanted a kid before, and I thought I would be upset when Savannah told me she was having a baby, but I wasn't. I was so happy. Now that I think about it, I've never been so happy.

I closed my eyes and started to drift off to sleep.

I've never been so happy.

THE END


End file.
